Also, everyone should check out this band called Stars Go Dim. I'm really digging them. Thinking about pre-ordering their cd. They are totally my style. Chill with great lyrics.
http://www.myspace.com/starsgodim
Thursday, July 16, 2009
I think that I am starting to get burnt out on school. I don't think I should have signed up for classes all summer. I think the constant stress and thinking about them is catching up with me. This current class I am taking is HARD and stressing me out a lot. I avoid thinking about it because I seriously can feel my blood pressure rise when I do. When I do think about it, it automatically makes me want to cry. I'm scared that I am wasting time and money and am going to fail this class. I need a break.
THe other thing is that I have found a happy medium the last few months. Not that I am happy, but not that I am super unhappy, like I used to be. Until lately. It's probably stress for the most part, but I am starting to feel myself fall into a bit of depression. I hate it. And I don't talk to anyone about it because I refuse to show any weakness or that anything is wrong with anyone when I am with them. I refuse to show that weakness. I wish that wasn't the way I am but it is. Many times, I find myself with friends, act happy when I am really not, and when I get home, I just want to cry for no particular reason. It's not healthy to not share things with people, but I can't. IDK why. I'm bad at talking about my feelings, refusing to ever let myself cry in front of people. Even last fall, when I was particular unhappy, when other people talked and started getting me to talk, I refused to let myself cry, despite them crying.
IDK. Most of this is just a random rant, realizing that I haven't posted in a VERY long time and that I felt like writing, as I usually do when I am down. That and listening to music, which I am also doing.
This road is anything but simple
Twisted like a riddle
I've seen high and I've seen low
So loud, the voices of all my doubts
Telling me to give up
To pack up and leave town
But even so I had to believe
Impossible means nothing to me
So can you lift me up?
And turn the ashes into flames
'Cause I have overcome more than words will ever say
And I've been given hope
That there's a light on up the hall
And that a day will come when the fight is won
And I think that day has just begun
Somewhere, everybody starts there
Counting on a small prayer
Lost in a nightmare
But I'm here and suddenly it's so clear
The struggle through the long years
It taught me to outrun my fears
And everything that's worth having
Comes with trials worth withstanding
Oh lift me up, oh lift me up, oh lift me up
Oh lift me up, oh lift me up, oh lift me up
Down and out is overrated
I need to be elevated
Looking up is not enough
I would rather rise above
Lift Me Up by Kate Voegele
THe other thing is that I have found a happy medium the last few months. Not that I am happy, but not that I am super unhappy, like I used to be. Until lately. It's probably stress for the most part, but I am starting to feel myself fall into a bit of depression. I hate it. And I don't talk to anyone about it because I refuse to show any weakness or that anything is wrong with anyone when I am with them. I refuse to show that weakness. I wish that wasn't the way I am but it is. Many times, I find myself with friends, act happy when I am really not, and when I get home, I just want to cry for no particular reason. It's not healthy to not share things with people, but I can't. IDK why. I'm bad at talking about my feelings, refusing to ever let myself cry in front of people. Even last fall, when I was particular unhappy, when other people talked and started getting me to talk, I refused to let myself cry, despite them crying.
IDK. Most of this is just a random rant, realizing that I haven't posted in a VERY long time and that I felt like writing, as I usually do when I am down. That and listening to music, which I am also doing.
This road is anything but simple
Twisted like a riddle
I've seen high and I've seen low
So loud, the voices of all my doubts
Telling me to give up
To pack up and leave town
But even so I had to believe
Impossible means nothing to me
So can you lift me up?
And turn the ashes into flames
'Cause I have overcome more than words will ever say
And I've been given hope
That there's a light on up the hall
And that a day will come when the fight is won
And I think that day has just begun
Somewhere, everybody starts there
Counting on a small prayer
Lost in a nightmare
But I'm here and suddenly it's so clear
The struggle through the long years
It taught me to outrun my fears
And everything that's worth having
Comes with trials worth withstanding
Oh lift me up, oh lift me up, oh lift me up
Oh lift me up, oh lift me up, oh lift me up
Down and out is overrated
I need to be elevated
Looking up is not enough
I would rather rise above
Lift Me Up by Kate Voegele
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
